When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
