Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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