what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
i drank out of a bidet.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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