K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
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