I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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