can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
