You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
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