so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
