you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
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