Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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