why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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