And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
