I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
Randomize
