Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
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