One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
