Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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