Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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