i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
