there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
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