belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
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the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
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BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
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