just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize