And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
i need some magic done to my vagina
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
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