but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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