How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
