I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize