Dude my mom stole all your condoms
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
