there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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