That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
We have so much sex to catch up on
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
