Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
