My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I have no idea why my husband is mad that I came home at 4 am & all I want to do is eat spaghettios. It's not fucking spaghettios fault.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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