yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
