I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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