Your tits are I can't wait for
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
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