haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
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