No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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