I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
I did not marry a roomba.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
