Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
