You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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