...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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