I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
