So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
organizing the empties. That sober.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I would ride that face into the sunset
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Randomize
