Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
