also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
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After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
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Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
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