dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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