How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, I said I'm sorry. In the shower, "are you happy to see me" sounded just like "could you please pee on me". Honest mistake.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Randomize