why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
Randomize
