Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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