super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
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