i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
She bit a glass in half.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize