tell your sister to shave her snatch
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
