Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize