I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???